Grateful Person | Leveraging Gratitude for Growth and Well-Being

A grateful person doesn’t simply say thank you, instead they perceive the world a little differently. Gratitude shapes how they think, feel, relate, and grow. In this post, we’ll explore what it truly means to be a grateful person, including the core character traits that often accompany gratitude, the science behind how it improves mental health and rewires the brain, and how practicing gratitude can transform your work, relationships, and sense of self. You’ll also learn practical techniques for building a consistent gratitude practice, even during life’s toughest moments.

Key Takeaways

• Gratitude is a mindset and character trait that shapes how you see, feel, and engage with the world.
• It improves mental health by reducing depression, anxiety, and toxic emotions while enhancing brain function and sleep.
• In the workplace and in relationships, gratitude builds trust, motivation, and long-term connection.
• Gratitude supports the authentic self by aligning you with your values and reducing the need for external validation.
• Gratitude can be practiced even during hard times, helping you find meaning and emotional strength through challenge.

Table of Contents

• What is the Definition of Grateful?
• What Makes Someone a Truly Grateful Person?
• Grateful Character Trait Spotlight
• Self-Assessment: How Grateful Are You Currently?
• The Science - How Gratitude Rewires Your Brain
• Life-Changing Benefits of Being a Grateful Person
• Overcoming Obstacles - When Gratitude Doesn't Come Easily
• Practical Systems - Building Your Gratitude Practice
• Measuring Growth: Your Gratitude Journey
• Frequently Asked Questions

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What is the Definition of Grateful?

To be grateful means feeling or showing an appreciation for something done or received. It involves recognizing the goodness in your life. It is often linked to acts of kindness, support, or positive experiences, and expressing thanks or acknowledgment in return.

Being grateful is basically just noticing the good stuff in your life and feeling thankful for it. It could be big things, like someone helping you through a hard time, or little things, like a nice text from a friend or a good cup of coffee in the morning.

A grateful person doesn’t take those things for granted. They tend to focus more on what’s going right than what’s going wrong, and they usually make the people around them feel appreciated too.

What Makes Someone a Truly Grateful Person?

A grateful person embodies the grateful character trait that influences how they perceive and respond to life. Here are some common attributes of truly grateful people:

• Often notice details others miss
• Maintain perspective during difficult experiences
• Separate people's actions from their worth
• Recognize interdependence; not just independence
• Experience frequent positive emotions
• Recover more quickly from negative events
• Maintain emotional balance during uncertainty
• Feel genuine joy in others' successes
• Express appreciation and admiration specifically and promptly
• Perform random acts of kindness regularly
• Celebrate small wins rather than just major achievements
• Actively contribute to others' well-being

Grateful Character Trait Spotlight

We looked at a subset of True Mydentity’s free questionnaire responses for 502 people who ranked 80% or higher in dominance for the grateful positive character trait. This subset of individuals also shared high dominance ranks (80 or higher) for the following four positive character traits.

• Respectful (387 individuals) - These individuals tend to deeply honor others' boundaries, beliefs, and experiences. Gratitude and respect often go hand in hand, as both stem from recognizing and valuing others.
• Admiring (383 individuals) - High-gratitude individuals frequently express appreciation for others’ strengths. This openness to admiration fosters positive relationships and models a strengths-based outlook on life.
• Open-Minded (324 individuals) - Gratitude appears to widen people’s perspective. Those who are grateful are often more accepting of different views and ideas, allowing them to grow from diverse experiences.
• Intelligent (315 individuals) - Not just academic smarts, but practical emotional intelligence. Grateful individuals often show thoughtfulness and wisdom in how they process challenges and interact with others.

According to True Mydentity’s questionnaire responses, these are the top five most common and most dominant out of the 58 positive character traits associated with someone who has a dominant grateful character trait.

Why This Matters

If you're someone who leads with gratitude, you likely have a natural edge when it comes to personal development, emotional intelligence, and relationship-building. Recognizing this pattern can help you:

• Build on your strengths with intention
• Identify other traits that can be cultivated alongside gratitude
• Make more informed choices in how you show up in relationships, work, and life

Be sure to take the free True Mydentity questionnaire if you wish to find out more about your own positive characteristics, how dominant your grateful character trait ranks, and how it compares to your other 57 traits.

Self-Assessment: How Grateful Are You Currently?

Consider these questions to gauge your current gratitude level:

• Do you regularly notice and appreciate small pleasures throughout your day?
• When facing challenges, how quickly do you find potential benefits or lessons?
• How often do you express specific appreciation to others?
• Do you tend to focus more on what you have or what you lack?
• How conscious are you of the people and systems that support your daily life?
• When receiving help, do you fully acknowledge the effort others made?
• Can you find things to appreciate even on difficult days?
• Do you regularly reflect on progress and growth rather than just unmet goals?

If you answered "rarely" or "sometimes" to several questions, you may have an opportunity to strengthen your practice of gratitude if you’re inclined to do so. Like any character trait, gratitude can be developed with intention and practice, and we offer some way in this post.

The Science - How Gratitude Rewires Your Brain

When you practice gratitude, your brain undergoes measurable changes that directly impact your mental health and performance.

Neurological Rewards of Being Grateful

A group of researchers in China found that higher levels of gratitude were linked to better sleep and lower levels of anxiety and depression. Specifically, gratitude had a direct impact on reducing depression symptoms. The more gratitude people felt, the less depressed they were. Gratitude also had an indirect effect on anxiety by improving sleep quality, which in turn reduced anxiety levels.

In short, gratitude not only helps you sleep better, but it also plays a meaningful role in lowering both depression and anxiety.

Gratitude Writing and Your Brain

A study shared by Joshua Brown and Joel Wong in Greater Good Magazine by UC Berkley, How Gratitude Changes You and Your Brain, involved nearly 300 adults, mostly college students. They recruited participants just before they began attending counseling sessions. The majority seeking counseling were struggling with issues related to depression and anxiety.

They were broken into 3 groups:

• Group 1: Instructed to write one letter of gratitude to another person each week for three weeks
• Group 2: Instructed to write about their deepest thoughts and feelings about negative experiences.
• Group 3: Did no writing activity.

The Findings:

Those who wrote gratitude letters reported, "significantly better mental health four weeks and 12 weeks after the writing exercise ended."

1. Gratitude Reduces Toxic Emotions

Participants who wrote gratitude letters used more positive and inclusive language, and fewer negative emotion words than those who wrote about negative experiences. This suggests that expressing gratitude helps shift focus away from toxic emotions and promotes healthier thinking patterns.

2. Gratitude Works Even If You Don’t Share It

The benefits of gratitude writing occurred regardless of whether participants actually sent their letters. Simply writing a gratitude letter was enough to improve mental well-being. This shows that the internal act of reflecting on what you're thankful for carries its own power.

3. Gratitude’s Benefits Build Over Time

Mental health improvements in the gratitude group didn’t show up right away but grew significantly at 4 weeks and even more by 12 weeks after writing. This suggests that gratitude writing has a delayed but growing impact, possibly due to ongoing reflection or positive conversations sparked by the writing.

4. Gratitude Changes the Brain

Three months later, participants who wrote gratitude letters showed different brain activity patterns on fMRI scans during a giving task. Their brains appeared more responsive to gratitude-related decisions, suggesting that practicing gratitude may have lasting neurological effects that shape how we process generosity and social connection.

Life-Changing Benefits of Being a Grateful Person

Gratitude at Work can be Career Catalyst

Gratitude is a powerful but often underused tool in the workplace. When practiced intentionally, it can enhance both your day-to-day experience and your long-term career growth. Here’s a breakdown of how showing gratitude and living gratefully at work can benefit you.

1. Boosts Your Mood and Reduces Stress

Being grateful shifts your focus from what’s frustrating to what’s working. It can help to reduce tension and allow you to feel more positive throughout the day. Even on those crazy days. You know the ones.

Example: Instead of stewing about a last-minute meeting, remind yourself how supportive your team is and that they’re helping you succeed. That mindset shift can keep your stress levels in check.

2. Improves Relationships with Coworkers

Gratitude helps to build a stronger connection with others. When you thank others or acknowledge their efforts, it builds trust and improves collaboration.

Example: You send a quick message to a colleague who helped you solve a client issue. They feel appreciated, and next time, they’re more likely to lend a hand again.

3. Increases Motivation and Engagement

Gratitude helps you feel more invested in your work. When you recognize what you're thankful for at work, you’re more motivated to show up and do well, and you will better recognize the opportunities you want when they present themselves.

Example: You start your day by jotting down one thing you're grateful for at work because it puts you in a proactive and positive mindset.

4. Encourages a Growth Mindset

Grateful people are more likely to see challenges as learning experiences rather than setbacks, and that these challenges present new opportunities for further development and growth.

Example: After receiving constructive feedback on a project, instead of getting defensive, you feel grateful for the chance to improve your skills.

5. Builds a Positive Reputation

People notice when you consistently acknowledge others and handle situations with grace. Gratitude builds your brand as someone who’s respectful, collaborative, and emotionally intelligent.

Example: Over time, your thank you emails, supportive comments, and calm demeanor earn you a reputation as a trusted team player and future leader.

6. Strengthens Your Professional Network

Gratitude keeps relationships alive. When you thank mentors, former colleagues, or connections after they help you, you stay top of mind in a positive way.

Example: You follow up with a former coworker to say thank you for a past referral. Later, they think of you for a new opportunity.

7. Improves Leadership Potential

Leaders who show appreciation often create motivated teams and higher morale. Gratitude helps you stand out as someone people want to work with.

Example: As a team lead, you regularly recognize each member’s contributions in meetings. Your team feels valued and performs better, reflecting well on your leadership.

Relationship Revolution - Gratitude in Personal Connections

Practicing gratitude in your romantic, familial, or platonic relationships builds trust, strengthens bonds, and helps relationships feel more rewarding and resilient. Below is a breakdown of how showing gratitude and living gratefully in your relationships can benefit both your daily life and your long-term connection with others.

1. Enhances Emotional Connection

When you express appreciation regularly, you help the other person feel seen, valued, and emotionally safe. It encourages a cycle of kindness and support over the long-term.

Example: Saying “Thanks for making dinner. I really needed that tonight” lets your partner know their effort matters, and this deepens your emotional bond.

2. Reduces Conflict and Resentment

Gratitude shifts focus from flaws to strengths. It makes it easier to let go of small annoyances and prevent resentment from building.

Example: Instead of focusing on your friend running late, you remind yourself how they always show up when it counts. That mindset prevents unnecessary tension.

3. Increases Everyday Joy

Gratitude amplifies the small positive moments you might otherwise overlook.
Example: You pause to appreciate a silly text from your sibling during a busy day, and it lifts your mood more than you expected.

4. Builds Lasting Trust and Security

Over time, expressing gratitude builds a deep sense of reliability and emotional safety between people.

Example: You consistently thank your partner for emotional support and their small acts of care, and it builds a foundation of trust that makes it easier to weather bigger challenges later.

5. Fosters Forgiveness and Compassion

Gratitude helps you recall the good during tough times, making it easier to offer grace when someone makes a mistake, and to find forgiveness.

Example: During an argument with your spouse, you reflect on all they’ve done for you. This helps you respond with compassion instead of criticism or blame.

Inner Alignment - Gratitude and Authentic Self-Discovery

Living gratefully and living authentically go hand in hand. Gratitude grounds you in what matters most, helps you accept yourself and others more fully, and reduces the pressure to perform or pretend. Here’s how gratitude can help you live more authentically.

1. Shifts Your Focus to What’s True for You

Gratitude brings awareness to what you genuinely value, helping you make choices that reflect your real priorities, not based upon someone else’s expectations.

Example: You feel thankful for quiet mornings and deep conversations, so you stop overcommitting to late evening social events that drain you, cause you to sleep in later, and leave your mind foggy throughout the day.

2. Reduces the Need to Seek Approval

When you focus on what you’re grateful for in your life, you become less dependent on outside validation, and you’re able to focus more on the things that bring you joy.

Example: You stop comparing your career path to others because your current role, and the path you’re on, is leading you to what you want to get out of your career.

3. Helps You Accept Yourself with Compassion

Gratitude for your own growth and experiences (even the messy ones) makes it easier to show up honestly and let go of perfectionism.

Example: You’re grateful for how far you’ve come emotionally, so instead of hiding your struggles, you share openly with a trusted friend or loved one.

4. Encourages Present-Moment Awareness

Gratitude opens you up to receive what’s happening now. It reduces the noise of who you “should” be and helps you embrace who you actually are.

Example: You take a moment to savor your morning coffee in silence. This calms you and reconnects with your need for peace and presence.

5. Clarifies Your Core Values

Over time, being grateful helps you recognize patterns in what lights you up and may reveal the values that guide your most authentic decisions.

Example: You consistently feel grateful for moments of helping others, so you start steering your career and relationships toward service-oriented roles.

6. Strengthens Confidence in Your True Identity

Gratitude reinforces what makes your life meaningful, helping you feel more secure being yourself.

Example: You regularly express thanks for your creativity and resilience, which reinforces your beliefs, and gives you the confidence and comfort to not hide or downplay your gifts.

7. Fosters Authentic Relationships

Grateful people tend to be open and affirming, which attracts deeper, more honest connections over time.

Example: You express genuine appreciation to a friend for always listening without judgment, and that honesty strengthens the trust between you.

8. Sustains a Purpose-Driven Life

Gratitude keeps you aligned with purpose. It reminds you of what truly matters to you and supports your beliefs, even during extreme challenges and uncertainty.

Example: When life gets overwhelming, you reflect on the people, values, and growth you’re thankful for, which helps you stay grounded in your personal mission.

These benefits are particularly significant for adults who often question whether they're on the right path. When you practice gratitude regularly, you create space to recognize what genuinely energizes and fulfills you.

Overcoming Obstacles - When Gratitude Doesn't Come Easily

The 3:1 Positivity Ratio

There is a well-researched concept known as the 3:1 positivity ratio, popularized by Dr. Barbara Fredrickson, a leading researcher in positive psychology. The idea is simple but powerful:

The practice of the Positivity Ratio is for every 1 negative thought, experience, or interaction; aim to recognize at least 3 positive ones to maintain emotional balance.

Dr. Fredrickson’s research found that people who experience positive mental health, creativity, and resilience tend to have a positivity-to-negativity ratio of at least 3:1.

• Flourishing = 3+ positive emotions for every 1 negative
• Languishing = Fewer than 3 positives per negative

It’s not about denying negative emotions. It's about intentionally noticing, creating, or savoring positive experiences so that the negative ones don’t dominate your inner world.

Here’s how people apply the 3:1 ratio to build resilience and authentic well-being:

1. Daily Gratitude Journaling - Write down 3 good things that happened today for every 1 frustrating or disappointing event.

Example: Your meeting ran long and derailed your schedule, but you’re grateful for a teammate’s help, a kind email, and good coffee.

2. Relationship Check-ins - For every criticism or complaint you feel or express, follow up with 3 affirmations, appreciations, or caring gestures.

Example: You’re annoyed your partner forgot something, so you also remind yourself of 3 ways they support you daily.

3. Work-Related Reflections - If your mind dwells on a mistake or setback at work, list 3 ways you contributed positively that day.

Example: You missed a deadline, but you helped a colleague, contributed to a brainstorm, and kept calm under pressure.

The 3:1 Positivity Ratio isn’t about perfection or building toxic positivity. Instead, it’s about rebalancing your perspective. As we’re influenced by negativity bias, it gives your authentic self more space to thrive and grow by making more room for optimism, appreciation, and connection.

4 Ways to Find Gratitude During Life's Hardest Moments

There are four well-known, research-backed techniques for finding gratitude during life’s hardest moments. These practices don’t deny pain or hardship. Instead, they help integrate gratitude alongside the struggle.

1. “Even Though...” Reframing

This technique acknowledges the hardship, then pairs it with a seed of gratitude or strength.

Example - “Even though I lost my job, I’m grateful for the people supporting me and the space to reevaluate what I want next.”

Why it works - It validates your pain but prevents it from consuming your entire perspective.

2. Benefit Finding

Ask: “What growth, lesson, or hidden gift might eventually come from this experience?”

Example - After a painful breakup, you might realize you’re now more aware of what you need in a healthy relationship.

Why it works - According to positive psychology, people who practice benefit finding are more likely to heal emotionally and feel empowered post-trauma.

3. Gratitude Letters (Even if Not Sent)

Write a letter to someone you feel thankful for, especially someone who helped you during tough times, even if they are still in your life.

Example - A letter to a childhood teacher who believed in you when no one else did.

Why it works - This deepens emotional meaning and reconnects you with moments of support, love, or impact.

4. "Gratitude Anchors" Practice

Create physical or mental reminders (a necklace, a mantra, a journal entry) that ground you in something you're still grateful for, even if it's small.

Example - “I’m grateful for my breath. For morning light. For my dog’s steady presence.”

Why it works - This stabilizes your nervous system and creates consistency during emotional turbulence.

Gratitude during hard times isn’t about pretending everything’s okay. It’s about finding light in the darkness, however faint. Even a single thread of appreciation can become a lifeline back to yourself.

Practical Systems - Building Your Gratitude Practice

The Gratitude Journal - More Than Just Listing Blessings

Journaling remains one of the most effective gratitude practices, but the approach matters:

Effective Journaling Strategies:

• Depth Over Breadth - Write extensively about one thing rather than briefly listing many
• Surprise Focus - Emphasize unexpected positive events for greater impact
• Specific Details - Include sensory information and concrete details
• People Emphasis - Focus on people you're grateful for rather than just things

Sample Prompts for Different Life Areas:

• Career Growth - "What skill am I developing that I'm grateful to have access to?"
• Relationship Building - "What quality do I appreciate in someone close to me that I often take for granted?"
• Personal Development - "What challenge am I facing that might be teaching me something valuable?"
• Physical Wellbeing - "What can my body do today that I appreciate?"

For the busiest professionals and parents, even 3-5 minutes of focused journaling can yield significant benefits. The key is consistency and depth rather than length.

Beyond Journaling - Multidimensional Gratitude Practices

While journals work well for many, there are numerous ways to incorporate gratitude into your daily routine:

Morning Mindset Practices:

• Begin the day by naming three specific things you anticipate with gratitude
• Send a brief message of appreciation to someone before checking emails or news

Workplace Gratitude Integration:

• Create a "wins jar" where team members note accomplishments and expressions of thanks
• Implement a "gratitude minute" at the beginning of meetings
• Develop the habit of specific, authentic praise for colleagues

Family and Relationship Practices:

• Establish a dinner ritual where each person shares a moment of gratitude
• Create a family gratitude jar that you review together monthly
• Practice "appreciation pauses" during conflicts to remember what you value about the other person

Digital Integration:

• Use specialized gratitude apps with reminders and tracking, like Gratitude: Self-Care Journal. It is the most popular app for practicing gratitude and it's available for Apple iOS and Android.
• Create a private gratitude photo album on your phone
• Record voice notes of appreciation during commutes

Measuring Growth: Your Gratitude Journey

Most people require 3-6 months of consistent practice to move from awakening to habit formation, and 9-12 months to reach identity integration. Be patient with your progress and try to become aware of these subtle shifts in how you think and behave:

• Frequency - How often you experience spontaneous feelings of gratitude
• Recovery Speed - How quickly you regain perspective after setbacks
• Expression Comfort - How naturally you articulate appreciation to others
• Complaint Ratio - The balance between expressions of gratitude versus complaint
• Perspective Taking - Your ability to find meaning in challenging situations

Consider keeping a monthly "gratitude temperature check" using these indicators to track your progress over time.

IMPORTANT: If you find yourself struggling to feel grateful and appreciate things in your life, please reach out to a trained professional who can help.

Frequently Asked Questions

How quickly will I notice benefits from gratitude practice?

People report mood improvements within 2-4 weeks of consistent practice. Most people require 3-6 months of consistent practice to move from awakening to habit formation, and 9-12 months to reach identity integration. Individual results vary based on consistency and depth of practice.

Can gratitude feel forced or inauthentic?

Absolutely. When beginning any new practice, it often feels mechanical or artificial. This is normal and temporary. Start with genuine appreciation, even if small, rather than forcing gratitude for things you don't truly feel thankful for. Authenticity grows with practice as neural pathways strengthen.

Will gratitude make me complacent about improving my life?

Research shows the opposite effect. Grateful people are more likely to take positive action to improve their circumstances because they operate from a place of resources rather than scarcity. Gratitude provides emotional fuel for effective change.

How can I practice gratitude when I'm truly struggling?

During extremely difficult periods, scale back expectations. Focus on tiny appreciations like a moment without pain, a brief connection, or simply continuing to breathe. These micro-gratitudes create stepping stones through dark times without minimizing genuine suffering.

How does gratitude practice differ for different personality types?

Introverts often prefer reflective practices like journaling, while extroverts may benefit more from verbal expression and social gratitude practices. Analytical types might track gratitude metrics, while intuitive types might prefer creative expression through art or storytelling. Experiment to find approaches that resonate with your natural tendencies.

What if my gratitude practice becomes just another "should"?

When gratitude becomes an obligation rather than a choice, take a step back. Experiment with different approaches, reduce frequency if needed, or take a short break while maintaining awareness of things you naturally appreciate. The goal is integration, not perfection.

Gain Awareness - Take Free Character Trait Assessment

Maybe your most dominant positive character trait is being grateful? Take True Mydentity’s free character trait questionnaire to discover how dominant your 58 positive character traits are and which are the most dominant.